Pat: It is said that we, men, need to love women like Christ loved the church. You were never asked to love us, but we need to love you. Like Christ loved the church.
Me: To the extent that you'd die for us?
Pat: Dying is easy. We have to live for you. We're all not perfect when it comes to this. But we try. You know, present yourselves as living sacrifices and all that. The only problem with living sacrifices is they tend to wriggle off the sacrificial table every now and then. But we try.
Friday, November 4, 2016
Family Conversations: Dreams
Me: Pat, why do a lot of young people not have dreams anymore?
Pat: Because the young people don't sleep anymore.
Pat: Because the young people don't sleep anymore.
Ungrateful
Dear Lord,
You are a good God. I have seen Your goodness in the land of the living. I called to You and You helped me. You plucked my feet out from the traps that bound me. I was overtaken by my financial problems, but You, Lord, gave me rest. I called to You in my distress. I didn't know how to get out of the pit. No one wanted me for the price I needed, and I called to You for help. And You gave me this job, which paid for how much I needed to pay for my financial obligations. And it is a job with two functions. You know me so well that You know that a double-functioned job is needed to keep me from getting too bored. You have thought of that, too.
It would take me two years to pay for my debts. You are giving me two years of respite. But what does my selfish heart do? I have been ungrateful. Instead of accepting the rest You have given me, I go and find other projects to help me feel significant. I did not trust in the value You have given me. Instead of thanking You, praising You, and enjoying the two years You have given me, I complain, I struggle. I sought to find a way to break free. I made a deal with an organization without consulting You. And they said yes, for I know that You have given me the ability to make them say yes. But is this even Your will? Deep in my heart, I know it isn't because it goes against what You have given me. Taking this on will cost more money. Taking this on will deprive me of rest. But also, taking this on at this time, I know that the motives of my heart isn't pleasing to you. It's not because I want to help, or I think it will glorify You. It's because I'm afraid of insignificance.
Instead of rejoicing that Andro is nearby and this is a good opportunity to strengthen our friendship, I look at what I have lost. That I'm so far away from my friends, that I'm so far away from my sisters and parents, that I miss my organization. But if I'm to look at it with the eyes of a grateful person, I would see that this is a great opportunity to build new friendships, an opportunity to lose weight, to contemplate, to exercise. I keep on focusing on what I lack and what I have lost instead of what I have and what opportunity there are.
Lord! Forgive me my ungratefulness. Here is what I want to do, for your glory, O Lord: I will live in Ortigas, in Pearl, really live here. I will develop good eating habits and exercise regularly. I will make friends here. I will root here for two years. I will find a way to increase my energy so I can function properly. I will wake up at 6:00 and sleep at 10:00. I'll take an hour for quiet time. I will exercise 3x a week. I will meet up with a friend once a week. I will enjoy myself in this area.
Then I will excel at this work I'm in. I will train my supervisor so he can be a good employee and support me properly. As for the coders, I need to make them feel supported and believed in. I need to up our quality. I will stop complaining and only talk of good things. I don't need to take over all the aspects of the company, but only do my very best in the position I have been given. I need to stop trying to build new businesses for now. I need to step back and not be the boss, and not be afraid of insignificance because my value is fixed in You, in that I am Yours.
As an on the side, I will help Andro with his project. I will train in game design, and I need to read a lot again. That's it. I just need to train. And slowly plan how I'll do my games when I come back in two years. No implementation. Just training and planning.
But here's my problem, Lord. I've just set something into motion again. And I'm flying to Japan again at the end of the month to work on it. Lord, what to do? In my disobedience, I have caused this. But You are a God who makes the biggest miracles out of our worst mistakes. Father, I lay this at your feet. It excites me, but for the wrong reasons. So I lay it at your feet. I have started it so I will go and continue it as best as I could. But I turn away from my selfishness now and turn to You. Kill it if You will. Or prosper it as You will. But take me back into Your favor and forgive me my ungratefulness. I know You can salvage this. Therefore, I lay it down at your feet. Make it happen or make it not. But be my God no matter what. Take me back and let me dwell in Your will.
O Lord, be with me. You promised to perfect that which concerns me so, please, take me back, O Lord, and take over. Amen.
You are a good God. I have seen Your goodness in the land of the living. I called to You and You helped me. You plucked my feet out from the traps that bound me. I was overtaken by my financial problems, but You, Lord, gave me rest. I called to You in my distress. I didn't know how to get out of the pit. No one wanted me for the price I needed, and I called to You for help. And You gave me this job, which paid for how much I needed to pay for my financial obligations. And it is a job with two functions. You know me so well that You know that a double-functioned job is needed to keep me from getting too bored. You have thought of that, too.
It would take me two years to pay for my debts. You are giving me two years of respite. But what does my selfish heart do? I have been ungrateful. Instead of accepting the rest You have given me, I go and find other projects to help me feel significant. I did not trust in the value You have given me. Instead of thanking You, praising You, and enjoying the two years You have given me, I complain, I struggle. I sought to find a way to break free. I made a deal with an organization without consulting You. And they said yes, for I know that You have given me the ability to make them say yes. But is this even Your will? Deep in my heart, I know it isn't because it goes against what You have given me. Taking this on will cost more money. Taking this on will deprive me of rest. But also, taking this on at this time, I know that the motives of my heart isn't pleasing to you. It's not because I want to help, or I think it will glorify You. It's because I'm afraid of insignificance.
Instead of rejoicing that Andro is nearby and this is a good opportunity to strengthen our friendship, I look at what I have lost. That I'm so far away from my friends, that I'm so far away from my sisters and parents, that I miss my organization. But if I'm to look at it with the eyes of a grateful person, I would see that this is a great opportunity to build new friendships, an opportunity to lose weight, to contemplate, to exercise. I keep on focusing on what I lack and what I have lost instead of what I have and what opportunity there are.
Lord! Forgive me my ungratefulness. Here is what I want to do, for your glory, O Lord: I will live in Ortigas, in Pearl, really live here. I will develop good eating habits and exercise regularly. I will make friends here. I will root here for two years. I will find a way to increase my energy so I can function properly. I will wake up at 6:00 and sleep at 10:00. I'll take an hour for quiet time. I will exercise 3x a week. I will meet up with a friend once a week. I will enjoy myself in this area.
Then I will excel at this work I'm in. I will train my supervisor so he can be a good employee and support me properly. As for the coders, I need to make them feel supported and believed in. I need to up our quality. I will stop complaining and only talk of good things. I don't need to take over all the aspects of the company, but only do my very best in the position I have been given. I need to stop trying to build new businesses for now. I need to step back and not be the boss, and not be afraid of insignificance because my value is fixed in You, in that I am Yours.
As an on the side, I will help Andro with his project. I will train in game design, and I need to read a lot again. That's it. I just need to train. And slowly plan how I'll do my games when I come back in two years. No implementation. Just training and planning.
But here's my problem, Lord. I've just set something into motion again. And I'm flying to Japan again at the end of the month to work on it. Lord, what to do? In my disobedience, I have caused this. But You are a God who makes the biggest miracles out of our worst mistakes. Father, I lay this at your feet. It excites me, but for the wrong reasons. So I lay it at your feet. I have started it so I will go and continue it as best as I could. But I turn away from my selfishness now and turn to You. Kill it if You will. Or prosper it as You will. But take me back into Your favor and forgive me my ungratefulness. I know You can salvage this. Therefore, I lay it down at your feet. Make it happen or make it not. But be my God no matter what. Take me back and let me dwell in Your will.
O Lord, be with me. You promised to perfect that which concerns me so, please, take me back, O Lord, and take over. Amen.
Sunday, December 27, 2015
The Dark and the Light
Dear Lord,
Creator of the Universe, my God and Heavenly Father, praise and honor be yours forever and ever.
O, Lord, let me pour our my heart to You, for only to You is my heart stripped bare. Only to You can I let go of pretense. Lord, this I know You have told me: to rejoice, to live fully, to love completely, and to walk humbly with You. That would probably look like this. I wake up in the morning, excited about going about the work You have prepared for me. I am excited about getting to work to make games and episodes and comics and books to reach different segments of people to show them Your love, Your way, and going about showing how great and awesome and exciting Your world is. I am excited because I know I could do it. And I'm doing it for You, and it's greater than me. And so I get up excited. I eat breakfast with a song in my heart. I have sun in me, and that means energy enough to go to the gym and work out with that song still within me. Then I go to work, work that I believe in. Work that is not devoid of significance and meaning for I am doing it for the Creator of the Universe. I am doing it to bring hope and love and joy into the hearts of the young. My smile is ready on my lips. My team is there, and part of the things I hold as important is also the development and enjoyment of my employees. It is a wonderful and epic studio. We start the day with devotion. We end the week with celebration. And we help people. We go about the year reaching out. And not just giving money or feeding people. But giving them also significance, and hope, and dreams. Life is meaningful. And good. And joy is the path that is chosen.
But who will love me, Lord? Why is this sadness, this loneliness, persistent? I pray for Your love, Lord, so that I do not seek desperately. I pray for Your peace and joy, Lord, that I may be beautiful. And so my heart will quiet down.
Maybe for now, I'll just work for someone. But I will put on a different persona when I start this new job. For this season, I am soft-spoken, I smile readily, I am gentle, and I care about the people I work with. This is my training in humility. This is my training in reaching out and actually making people feel significance. I also need to reach out to my relatives. I need to give time to my aunts. And also take up responsibility for my goddaughter.
Creator of the Universe, my God and Heavenly Father, praise and honor be yours forever and ever.
O, Lord, let me pour our my heart to You, for only to You is my heart stripped bare. Only to You can I let go of pretense. Lord, this I know You have told me: to rejoice, to live fully, to love completely, and to walk humbly with You. That would probably look like this. I wake up in the morning, excited about going about the work You have prepared for me. I am excited about getting to work to make games and episodes and comics and books to reach different segments of people to show them Your love, Your way, and going about showing how great and awesome and exciting Your world is. I am excited because I know I could do it. And I'm doing it for You, and it's greater than me. And so I get up excited. I eat breakfast with a song in my heart. I have sun in me, and that means energy enough to go to the gym and work out with that song still within me. Then I go to work, work that I believe in. Work that is not devoid of significance and meaning for I am doing it for the Creator of the Universe. I am doing it to bring hope and love and joy into the hearts of the young. My smile is ready on my lips. My team is there, and part of the things I hold as important is also the development and enjoyment of my employees. It is a wonderful and epic studio. We start the day with devotion. We end the week with celebration. And we help people. We go about the year reaching out. And not just giving money or feeding people. But giving them also significance, and hope, and dreams. Life is meaningful. And good. And joy is the path that is chosen.
But who will love me, Lord? Why is this sadness, this loneliness, persistent? I pray for Your love, Lord, so that I do not seek desperately. I pray for Your peace and joy, Lord, that I may be beautiful. And so my heart will quiet down.
Maybe for now, I'll just work for someone. But I will put on a different persona when I start this new job. For this season, I am soft-spoken, I smile readily, I am gentle, and I care about the people I work with. This is my training in humility. This is my training in reaching out and actually making people feel significance. I also need to reach out to my relatives. I need to give time to my aunts. And also take up responsibility for my goddaughter.
Sunday, November 29, 2015
Be Still
“Awake! Why do You sleep, O Lord? Arise! Do not cast us off forever. Why do You hide Your face, And forget our affliction and our oppression? For our soul is bowed down to the dust; Our body clings to the ground. Arise for our help, And redeem us for Your mercies’ sake.”
Psalms 44:23-26 NKJV
“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”
Psalms 46:10 NKJV
Dear Lord,
Praise and honor and glory be Yours forever and ever. Thank You for friends, for family, for everything You have given me. I am blessed, very much so, Lord. And I thank You for that.
Lord, be with me as I start this new week. Lord, help me to make money. I do not want to be chained by this anymore. So, as You have commanded, I will do whatever I can to break free from these. But be with me. Be Mighty to save. Be the God who provides, who makes me not want, who loves me. My soul is in turmoil within me. Quiet my fears, O Lord. You are the God of encounters. Grant me the opportunity to get out of this pit I have dug myself in. For Your mercies' sake and for the sake of my family and Your love for me, save me, o my God. Be still, You have said. And know that You are God. Therefore, I will wait in awe of You. I will wait in hopeful anticipation of Your wonders and Your miracles.
Open my eyes, Lord, to what I'm supposed to do, to where I'm supposed to go. But please, help me, Lord. Show me what to do.
Amen.
Friday, October 30, 2015
I am Yours
You have made me, O God, wonderfully and fearfully. You have blessed me and protected me. You have given me friends and family who love me. And in all this, Your burden to me is light. Your instructions simple. And that is to rejoice. And I will rejoice, Lord, regardless of circumstance.
I pray for the opportunities You have thrown my way. If You will it, Lord, let me have them. Let me have what You will. Protect me as You always have. And I will not fret for You are with me.
Lord, I pray for wonders. I will seek Your wonders, Lord. I will turn my eyes to seek them, and I know I will find them if I look. So reveal Your glory, Lord. Put me in awe of You, for You are my God.
I pray for the opportunities You have thrown my way. If You will it, Lord, let me have them. Let me have what You will. Protect me as You always have. And I will not fret for You are with me.
Lord, I pray for wonders. I will seek Your wonders, Lord. I will turn my eyes to seek them, and I know I will find them if I look. So reveal Your glory, Lord. Put me in awe of You, for You are my God.
Saturday, October 24, 2015
Instructions
"Prepare your outside work, Make it fit for yourself in the field; And afterward build your house." - Proverbs 24:27
Lord God,
I am a blessed woman. My very name declares Your promise, Your oath, Your covenant. I am favored and loved, not only by my earthly father, who would choose his blindness over my shame, his pride over my education, or my partner, who invited and paid for me to go to this Ancient Paths seminar, but by You, O Lord, Creator of the Universe, Lover of my Soul, who made me fearfully and wonderfully, who knows the number of hair on my head, who knit me in my mother's womb, who knew me before I was even conceived. You love me, O God, with an everlasting love. You have spared my family from evil. And You have opened my eyes to what we need to break. By the blood of the Lord Jesus Christ, Lord, break the generational curse brought about by the unrighteousness of desecrating a marriage. And the generational curse brought about by dabbling in the arts we shouldn't. Release us from the victim spirit hounding our family's finances. Release us from whatever bondage keeps us unmarried.
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