The Dark and the Light

Dear Lord,

Creator of the Universe, my God and Heavenly Father, praise and honor be yours forever and ever.

O, Lord, let me pour our my heart to You, for only to You is my heart stripped bare. Only to You can I let go of pretense. Lord, this I know You have told me: to rejoice, to live fully, to love completely, and to walk humbly with You. That would probably look like this. I wake up in the morning, excited about going about the work You have prepared for me. I am excited about getting to work to make games and episodes and comics and books to reach different segments of people to show them Your love, Your way, and going about showing how great and awesome and exciting Your world is. I am excited because I know I could do it. And I'm doing it for You, and it's greater than me. And so I get up excited. I eat breakfast with a song in my heart. I have sun in me, and that means energy enough to go to the gym and work out with that song still within me. Then I go to work, work that I believe in. Work that is not devoid of significance and meaning for I am doing it for the Creator of the Universe. I am doing it to bring hope and love and joy into the hearts of the young. My smile is ready on my lips. My team is there, and part of the things I hold as important is also the development and enjoyment of my employees. It is a wonderful and epic studio. We start the day with devotion. We end the week with celebration. And we help people. We go about the year reaching out. And not just giving money or feeding people. But giving them also significance, and hope, and dreams. Life is meaningful. And good. And joy is the path that is chosen.

But who will love me, Lord? Why is this sadness, this loneliness, persistent? I pray for Your love, Lord, so that I do not seek desperately. I pray for Your peace and joy, Lord, that I may be beautiful. And so my heart will quiet down.

Maybe for now, I'll just work for someone. But I will put on a different persona when I start this new job. For this season, I am soft-spoken, I smile readily, I am gentle, and I care about the people I work with. This is my training in humility. This is my training in reaching out and actually making people feel significance. I also need to reach out to my relatives. I need to give time to my aunts. And also take up responsibility for my goddaughter.

Be Still

“Awake! Why do You sleep, O Lord? Arise! Do not cast us off forever. Why do You hide Your face, And forget our affliction and our oppression? For our soul is bowed down to the dust; Our body clings to the ground. Arise for our help, And redeem us for Your mercies’ sake.”

Psalms 44:23-26 NKJV

“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”

Psalms 46:10 NKJV

Dear Lord,

Praise and honor and glory be Yours forever and ever. Thank You for friends, for family, for everything You have given me. I am blessed, very much so, Lord. And I thank You for that.

Lord, be with me as I start this new week. Lord, help me to make money. I do not want to be chained by this anymore. So, as You have commanded, I will do whatever I can to break free from these. But be with me. Be Mighty to save. Be the God who provides, who makes me not want, who loves me. My soul is in turmoil within me. Quiet my fears, O Lord. You are the God of encounters. Grant me the opportunity to get out of this pit I have dug myself in. For Your mercies' sake and for the sake of my family and Your love for me, save me, o my God. Be still, You have said. And know that You are God. Therefore, I will wait in awe of You. I will wait in hopeful anticipation of Your wonders and Your miracles.

Open my eyes, Lord, to what I'm supposed to do, to where I'm supposed to go. But please, help me, Lord. Show me what to do.

Amen.

I am Yours

You have made me, O God, wonderfully and fearfully. You have blessed me and protected me. You have given me friends and family who love me. And in all this, Your burden to me is light. Your instructions simple. And that is to rejoice. And I will rejoice, Lord, regardless of circumstance.

I pray for the opportunities You have thrown my way. If You will it, Lord, let me have them. Let me have what You will. Protect me as You always have. And I will not fret for You are with me.

Lord, I pray for wonders. I will seek Your wonders, Lord. I will turn my eyes to seek them, and I know I will find them if I look. So reveal Your glory, Lord. Put me in awe of You, for You are my God.

Instructions

"Prepare your outside work, Make it fit for yourself in the field; And afterward build your house." - Proverbs 24:27

Lord God,

I am a blessed woman. My very name declares Your promise, Your oath, Your covenant. I am favored and loved, not only by my earthly father, who would choose his blindness over my shame, his pride over my education, or my partner, who invited and paid for me to go to this Ancient Paths seminar, but by You, O Lord, Creator of the Universe, Lover of my Soul, who made me fearfully and wonderfully, who knows the number of hair on my head, who knit me in my mother's womb, who knew me before I was even conceived. You love me, O God, with an everlasting love. You have spared my family from evil. And You have opened my eyes to what we need to break. By the blood of the Lord Jesus Christ, Lord, break the generational curse brought about by the unrighteousness of desecrating a marriage. And the generational curse brought about by dabbling in the arts we shouldn't. Release us from the victim spirit hounding our family's finances. Release us from whatever bondage keeps us unmarried.

Choosing life

Dear Lord,

Thank You for the learnings and for the friends. Thank You that he's putting boundaries. Thank You that I will miss him. Thank You for lunch today. Lord, I choose life, even if my heart wants to curl up and sleep. Fill me with Your Spirit, Lord. Lord Jesus, be my Lord and Savior. Fill me with Your Holy Spirit, Lord. Fill me to overflow that it will just overflow from my mouth and my hands and my feet and my smile.

Lord, I resolve to rejoice this day. I resolve to live this day. This day, I will choose to not let my emotions dictate my day. I only have lunch today. But I will be beautiful today. My worth is not in the success of my business. Is not in my ability to run a business. My worth is that I am Yours and You have called me.

Amen.

Salt of the Earth

“You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men.

“You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.

Matthew 5:13-16

Dear Lord,

Thank You for the beautiful new day! You have made it and so I will rejoice and be glad in it. May the heavens and the earth sing out Your praise. May honor and glory be Yours forever and ever. Amen.

Lord, please bless these hands as I go about my work today. I am about to pursue some paths, but let doors be opened where You want me to go, and let doors be closed where You don't want me to go. I know the values and lessons You have taught me, and so I know in my mind that the thing with the schools that I am pursuing may be the best thing to do given my situation. Strengthen my heart, Lord. Oh, Lord Jesus, come into my heart be my Lord and Savior. Saturate my heart and soul with Your Spirit. Baptize me with Your fire. Let me burn with love for You.

O Lord, let me be Yours. Be my Lord, my King. Let me do things for the good of Your Kingdom. I pray for my family, Lord. Help us with our financial situation. I know trials like these strengthen the family bond. But be always in our midst. And open the floodgates of Heaven, Lord, and bless my family abundantly that we, too, may be blessings to others.

You spoke, Lord, of being faithful in the small things. What small things can I do to be generous? What small things can I do to be salt and light to the earth? What small things can I do to show my family I love them?

I lift up to You this day. May You bless the day and all the interactions that happen within it. This I pray in Jesus' Name. Amen.

Losing One's Soul

Mark 8:36 NKJV

For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul?

Lord,

I may have lost a bit of mine. I don't like this life I've created. The one You gave me is wonderful, but I've tainted it with my ambition, fear, and lack of love. And because my family loves me, they suffer for my sake. I'm trying to get a job still. But I still have obligations. Please help me with them, Lord. Show me the way.